The Rules of Fandom

The rules of sports fandom, are, I think, quite complicated at times. There are those that take it very seriously- pick one, single team and back them without fail and without question throughout their entire lives. Such people can merely be serious fans or can be slightly deranged to the point of obsession. I take a different view, however- I think sports teams can come in threes.

Why 3? I don't know- it seems like a fairly random number at first glance, but, to me, I think it's OK if you're a fan of more than one team. One team should always be your number one (especially if your number one team is playing your number two team or so on and so forth) but by and large, I take the view that, with careful deliberation, if you find three teams you dig, then go ahead- do your thing.

Again, why 3? Why not 10? Well, I think there's a difference between being a fan and being a wannabe. Three teams that you've seen play, know the players on and genuinely enjoy watching is different if you just rush out and buy a Dallas Cowboys Jersey just because all your buddies are. Does that make sense? Like I said, I think it's OK to like more than one team, provided you know where you loyalties lie if your number one team plays your number two or your number three team.

Maybe none of this makes sense. But let me illustrate:

The NFL: I remember John Elway's last ride and how awesome it was- so yeah, I'm a Broncos fan. Living in Minnesota for two years has infected me a bit, so I've decided to be an atypical Iowan and be a Vikings fan. (Am so NOT a Cheesehead. Ew.) And... hmmm, I'd like to say that Joe Montana and Jerry Rice have inspired me to be a 49ers fan, but they haven't done anything for years now. But if they ever do again, I'd probably give 'em a cheer.

MLB: Twins. (Of course.) Cubs. (Not because I'm one of the sad members of that particular congregation but because I think a Curse of the Bambino makes sense. I think getting cursed for cheating in the 20s makes sense. I think a curse about a goat is just stupid and needs to go.) And... well, probably the BoSox. Again, I'm not a serious member of the BoSox Nation, but the excitement about their first shot at a title in like 80 years made me do something that I'd never, up until that point in my life, done before- I sat down and watched the World Series.

NBA: I really don't care about the NBA. I'm not that big of a basketball fan to begin with and the NBA hasn't interested me for years now. Anyone but the Lakers and I'm happy.

CFB: Iowa. College rules are a bit different- you should, until the day you die, support your alma mater. I mean, come on now. That's just how it should work. So yeah, Iowa. Aside from that, I'd say anyone but the usual suspects gets my support. (The Usual Suspects being: Michigan, Ohio State, USC, Oklahoma- the people that always win.)

EPL: Arsenal. I latched onto the Gunners because my Scouser second cousins have Liverpool completely locked up to themselves- and forbid me outright from being a ManU fan. Happily, living in America, I discovered the easiest way to spot a poser is usually any fool you see in a ManU jersey. A good 7 times out of 10 (that number is coming down, happily- it used to be as high 9 out of 10) they're usually ManU fans because 'that's where Beckham played.' In other words, total posers. Chelsea became number 2, because, well, they weren't ManU and they were just goooooood... and now, watching Aston Villa play Everton, I'm seriously considering making them my number 3 team. They're just fun to watch.

I guess my point is this: there are serious sports fans that can find a team and be crazy loyal, obsessed and hardcore about it. There are people who don't get sports (and thus do things like, for instance, walk into a bar in Liverpool wearing a ManU Jersey on game day, and so on and so forth) and then there are the mid-range people that just genuinely like the sport in question and a find a solid core of teams they can get behind. The ideal number of that core of teams?

3.